I just got back from my little 12 day vacation.Two days were spent driving. Is that vacationing? Sometimes I enjoy a road trip, good scenery, a good book to listen to (this time The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins), good company. We brought our dog along and she rode along in her kennel in the back of the Tundra. This is a nice truck, it is a 2007 black Tundra, 6 speed, biggest engine you can get, and is the Cadillac of trucks. It has a back seat as well, and Seth occupied that space. We have navigation, and bluetooth, leather seats that are heated (not needed this time) and not too bad on the gas mileage.

I decided to go to Utah for the birthday celebration of my 14 year old. Staying home, the last child of five, for his birthday did not sound too fun to him or me. Since all the family is in Utah except for my 3rd son, we headed up there for this “vacation”.

We hit hot weather on the drive up–about 106 degrees in the desert, and my “mother Eve” tendencies kicked in and I began to worry about the poor dog in the back of the truck bed. After a little ice water and continually monitoring the temp gauge, I squeezed her into the cab for a few hours–fur and all. German Shepherds are always shedding.

I love family. I love my kids and visiting them is the first thing on my list. But I am a mom and worry about them as well. We show up at B and M’s first. There behind the house where they live in the basement is the “crotch rocket” motorcycle that I had forbid my son to buy. He tries to claim that it is Howards–his neighbor ( Krammer of Seinfeld). But a mom cannot be fooled–

“You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can’t fool mom” (from The Little Rascals).

No helmet or jacket. No motorcycle license, no insurance, no peace of mind for me. I worry. I stress all night and do not sleep well. My mind reflects on all the horror stories I have heard or seen that have involved a motorcycle and death. No vacation here.

I beg him to sell it, put it back up for sale. Two helmets and a jacket show up–still I am not too happy. As of this writing I believe it is up for sale. I hope it is sold today.

My husband and I are still working to make sure the DOE grant is submitted by the deadline–that’s not much of a vacation, but luckily it was only two days of concern, and it went in on time.

If only I had endless energy. I try to press all the moments into a memory I can hold forever. Thinking about it makes me weep. Time is too constraining, and space too small. There must be another life to live where all is there, and no time. S’s birthday is good, we make a cake, the family gathers and my daughter and daughter in law help decorate it with Homestar Runner on it. Chocolate and it tastes good.

Not many presents, but I tell Seth we will cover that later. He does get some books, and coins, and seems satisfied. It feels like a vacation, but still some work involved to pull it all off. Money becomes an issue, talk of security. Talee and Ron are succumbing to the economy problems as business owners in the construction business, and we still have no agreement on paper with our venture capitalist. Got some emails though. Hmmm…..not much different than when we are home–same concerns. And no vacation from this.

The canyon where we stay, at Jeni’s is beautiful. I hike the mountains with the dog and am mother Eve to her two giant Mastiffs as she and Richard are in Italy for the summer in charge of BYU Study Abroad. At first I am not sure if her dogs will follow me but, alas, we did not lose them. Although, on the last night I had left them on the terrace and when I arrived back at the house that night I found Clementine in the house but no Buford. S and I look all over, and I worry that I have lost Jeni’s dog for sure. Somehow, he had come into the house, gone downstairs and opened the door to the basement, gone inside and shut it. He was there, and luckily had not chewed up anything.

We talk of moving, moving to the canyon. I want my cell and fast internet–maybe the mouth of the canyon, as all the way up where Jeni lives you are without. And a long road in. But the sky is beautiful. And Richard entices us with new words to the song, “Come to Zion… “Come to Springville, come to Springville…”

The season of spring was late, and I had allergies–no vacation there. Plenty of Claritin and Benadryl helped. We spend time with the kids, and I worry a little about Hyrum’s job booting cars. Being around people that hate you and yell at you is not so great. He works graveyard often, and I have concerns–so I buy him some pepper spray.

We drove home yesterday. The yard looked like I had been gone for three months. There is much to do. I have mowed the grass, and swept, and trimmed. In a few days it will look good again. The auto insurance needs to be paid. I took Gene to the airport to meet with Peter at the test site. Gasification is a big project and has been for over 25 years. I hope this is the security and the accomplishment of a life’s work. I wait patiently.

So, back to the idea of the vacation. This didn’t seem relaxing, I was more tired last night as I drifted off to sleep earlier than usual. Shouldn’t I be well-rested from my little vacation? I am not sure I have ever vacationed. I read my sister Jeni’s email from Italy–that sure does not sound like a vacation being a school-marm to a bunch of girls on a study abroad.

What is a vacation? vacation: a holiday period between terms in universities and law courts, a holiday; the action of vacating. I guess I did go on vacation–I vacated my home. The word vacation comes from an Old French word, about the year 1386 meaning “freedom or release” from some activity or occupation. It comes from the word in Latin– vacationem “leisure, a being free from duty” from the word– vacare meaning “be empty, free, or at leisure”. I know I was not “at leisure”– I only vacated my home. And maybe you could say I was between terms–terms of the “univeristy” at my house. I still had duty though. I was still involved in the activity of being mother Eve in a telestial state.

post script: B sold the bike today 🙂 ahhh….vacation